Scene 1 - Danny Tells it All
The scene fades in with Danny sitting at a table with his hair in a table, a Green Day shirt, and some aviators on, the same night where the 17th addition of Showdown is set to take place. Next to him is the always lovely, and somewhat dumbfounded, Trixy, in a smoking hot red cocktail dress. Behind them is an EWE Showdown logo. Trixy holds the microphone up to her mouth as a grinning Danny fantasizes about the microphone being his dick, spray painted black as a disguise.
Trixy: Hello, EWE fans. I am sitting here with EWE superstar, Danny Danger. Today, for you online fans here on EWE.com, we are going to have an exclusive, tell all interview with the one and only Addiction!… How are you feeling, Danny?
Danny Danger: Pssh, I’m ready for that damn match for sure.
Trixy: I’m sure you are. But, keep in mind, this interview is more personal kind of questions, then in ring, business type stuff.
Danny Danger: Alright. Ask away, Mrs. T… I’m all ears.
Trixy: OK, are you currently seeing anyone?
Danny Danger: Ha, no one but you, beautiful…
Twixy: Oh, stop… I meant like, in a relationship? Maybe, uh, a fiance?
Danny Danger: Oh shit… uh yeah… lovely girl named Carmen. Got her pregnant, didn’t have much of a choice, ya know?
Danny starts to laugh, then kind of stops.
Danny Danger: You can cut that out, right?
Twixy: OK… next question. Have you ever smoked pot?
Danny Danger: Yeah, when I was young and stupid. What of it?
Twixy: What happened the first time you smoked it?
Danny Danger: Well… I was kind of nervous, if my memory serves me correct, but if anything calms the nerves it’s weed. I personally don’t remember, but they said that in the beginning I was just really twitchy, then a little later I started getting kind of tipsy and a bit off-balance. After that everything started to be really funny and I was just like, happy, going around and sitting on stuff.
Trixy: That sounds kind of homo… what exactly did you sit on?
Danny Danger: Oh shit! They didn’t tell me!
Twixy: Hahaha… well, finish.
Danny Danger: Um, well, I was told that I found some cigarette lighter, and just kept playing with it over and over. It didn’t have enough fuel so it wouldn’t light… but I sat there for like, 20 minutes, just watching the sparks… after that I became a little more mellow and tried to play pool by myself. There were 3 balls on the table and it took me forever to get them in the damn holes… was funny though.
Trixy: Well, that’s cool. But--
Danny Danger: But, I’ve really gotta get going.
Twixy: What? But your match isn’t for like, an hour and a half!
Danny Danger: I know, but I’ve got to get ready. Plus, I want to cut a promo at the start of the show. It was fun, babe. Take care.
Danny suddenly plants a huge kiss on Trixy, much like Cena did to Maria all those times ago. Danny then exits, as Trixy looks a bit taken back. The scene cuts to Danny Danger who is walking down the hall, putting on a spiked dog collar. He walks right past Android #18, who is leaning up against some boxes with her title, as Danny just then notices her and walks backwards.
Android #18: Well look what the cat dragged in.
Danny Danger: Man, is it good to see you. Ya know, if I can win this week, and then win the Money in the Bank match, expect me to be coming for that bad boy.
Android #18: Ha, please. Exactly HOW many times have I destroyed you?
Danny Danger: You’ve never owned me, Eighteen. You’ve beaten me, but both times, they were the closest matches of both mine and your career.
Android #18: Speak for yourself. I almost hope you do win, so I could have another easy defense at the next Pay Per View after Mania.
They both kind of smirk at each other.
Danny Danger: Good to see ya, Eighteen.
Android #18: You too. Good luck out there.
Danny then walks away once more. Danny goes into his lockerroom as the scene fades out.
Scene 2 - In Ring
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The scene comes back in to thousands upon thousands of screaming fans. The opening video for Showdown plays and the fans scream. The cameras then cut over to the announcing team of Jimmy Justice and Jonathan Steele.
Jonathan Steele: Boy, Jimmy, we have an ELECTRIC crowd tonight!
Jimmy Justice: Yeah, and why wouldn’t we? I mean, we’ve got the return of the X-Core with Bret Unknown and Sterling James Keenan. We’ve got an open invite battle royal for the last spot in the Money in the Bank match. We’ve got a submission match with champ Android #18 and rookie David Hybrid. And to top it all off, we’ve got Law and Cameron Hayden vs. Divas of--
Suddenly, the opening bass of “In Too Deep” by Sum 41 begins to play, and everyone in the building goes insane. From the top of the ramp steps Danny Danger, wearing the same thing we saw him wearing when we last left off, with the exception of his hair being down, and a microphone in his right hand.
Jonathan Steele: Well, speaking of the battle royal, here comes one of the favorites in that match, Danny Danger, and it looks like he has something to say.
Danny rolls into the ring as he signals for them to cut off his entrance music. He smiles, slowly raising the microphone as the fans continue to cheer.
Danny Danger: Settle down, settle down, please. See, it’s been awhile since I’ve done what I feel EVERY wrestler should do if they have half a ball sack, and that’s come out here and say what’s on their mind in front of YOU, great EWE fans!
Again, everyone goes crazy.
Danny Danger: Oh man, oh man, where do I begin? Well, first, I’m gonna warn everyone. You see, there’s a lot of scared people back there. Not so much scared of ME, but more so, scared of losing period. See, I’m gonna leave here, maybe have something drink, do some push ups, whatever it is, but trust me, about an hour from deadline, there’s going to be a bunch of little whores trying to get their shit in last minute so “no one can see it and have stuff to go off of”…
The fans kind of boo.
Danny Danger: Well, the addiction doesn’t roll like that. I keep it simple. I’ll say what I have to say whenever I damn well please, because I KNOW that this match is mine no matter WHAT time I post my damn roleplays. Showing up 5 minutes before the deadline or not, Danny Danger is walking into this match, then walking out, one step closer to walking out of another match with a damn briefcase under my arm.
The fans cheer again.
Danny Danger: Buy, enough breaking kayfabe. Let’s get a little more serious… Let me start off by saying one name that I have not been able to get off my mind to save my damn life; Predator.
Some fans cheer, and some boo, the Danny half cheering, the Predator half booing.
Danny Danger: Predator, you’ve got a lot of nerve to bring your big ass out here and say that I’ve been “ducking” you. Man, I am Danny DANGER, and I didn’t get my last name by fucking accident. I got my ass kicked a lot, Pred, but I do it without complaint, because at the end of the day I know that atleast I stood my damn ground. I don’t care if you’re Shawn Ashlocke or if you’re Chad goddamn Donavan, because I ALWAYS face my demons.
This time, the fans cheer a little louder for Danny, although it’s still pretty much down the middle.
Danny Danger: You say you get on your knees? Well, that’s not surprising, but more so, you say you get on your knees and pray? Pray for the chance to get in the ring with me? Well maybe God does exist after all, because your prayers have now been answered. Tonight, in just about an hour, you will enter the very ring I now stand… and you’re going right back out when I throw you over the top rope, like I will everyone else in that match!
Now, about 75 percent of the fans cheer for that one.
Danny Danger: You’re gonna kill 3 birds with one stone, eh Predator? Well man, if you do the math I’m killing like 60 or so if I get into Money in the Bank. A shot at Nero Phoenix? Ticket to world title? Chance to prove myself? Shutting you and everyone else? Finally showing I AM worth something? The list goes on and on, Predator. So if you think that your steroid-fueled muscles will stop me from winning, then you’re crazier then Randy Savage.
As Danny grins and lets down the mic for a second, some fans cheer and others laugh.
Danny Danger: Predator, you’re over. I mean, you had you’re chance to shine here, but if just never happened for you. Winning the Mid Eastern title? Good start. Tag teaming with Law? Getting there. Then, last year, you get Money in the Bank… but, did you win and walk on that one final step to forever writing your name in the history books? No, you didn’t, you let yourself fade away like so many others… at one point, like me. And now, I am going to put you out of your misery. You’re a horse, and you just broke your leg… and tonight… I put the bullet in your fucking brain.
He pauses as the fans are a little shocked.
Danny Danger: Then, there’s White Tiger, a man everyone seems to have respect for, and rightfully so I must say. But you said one thing that I gotta say caught my attention… you said “it’s the Old School’s time in the sun”… man, that’s just it! You old fucking grapes have been in the sun so damn long, you guys are now raisins! Someone fresh, who’s name doesn’t end with -iger, or -teen, or -ikku has GOT to save this place. This is a NEW age, not an old one, which is why they need Danny Danger, not White Tiger.
He pauses…
Danny Danger: I’m sure, White Tiger, that you think I’m just another one of those cocky kids. Yeah, well, I am. I’m cocky and, basically, I am a kid. But this is a cocky, kidish era dude, and to say that I am needed right now is a damn understatement. I mean, honestly, do you people want to hear “Do you know where you are, you’re in the jungle baby, you’re gonna die” even one more fucking time?
There’s another mixed reaction to this. Most people under 25 saying no, most people above 87 saying yes and telling Danny to fuck a fat one.
Danny Danger: Well, I may be saying this for the first time, but it really isn’t up to you. Because once it comes down to it, the old with die, and the young will survive, and tonight, against the so called “legend”, the story will not be even the SLIGHTEST different, and I fucking guarantee that.
Like before, the fans still have a mixed reaction.
Danny Danger: But, I’m threw with him. Now we play the waiting game, until that battle royal starts. But before I go on, there’s someone I got to talk about. He’s another one of the names that’s been on my mind… it’s one of the main reasons I want to be in that match… it’s the one and only, Nero Phoenix. You people like that guy, right?
The fans boo heavily.
Danny Danger: Yeah… me too. See Nero, my mind has been completely cramped with all the evil, sickening things I want to do with you, and luckily for me, some of them involved ladders. Put Nero, I don’t want to wait until Wrestlemania, ya know, after I demolish these chumps tonight… so I say… you and me… right fucking now!
Danny drops his microphone and waits leaning against the ropes, staring directly at the entrance ramp. The fans start chanting, “Come the fuck out! *clap, clap, clap*, which makes Danny smirk. Suddenly, “Bleed American” by Jimmy Eat World plays, and out comes Nero in his ring gear and the fans go a little crazy. Nero stands at the top of the ramp, with a microphone in his right hand, appearing to be thinking, as Danny is blatantly daring him to get in the ring by sitting on the middle rope as you would do for a diva. Nero then smirks as he raises the microphone to his lips.
Nero Phoenix: Oh, you’d like that wouldn’t you, Danny? You’d like that wouldn’t you, EWE fans? Huh? The big “hero” beating the “bad guy” before Mania, so he can’t compete in Money in the Bank? Haha, Danny, what kind of idiot do you take me for.
Danny mouths “
the idiot kind” as the fans laugh, but it doesn’t phase Nero.
Nero Phoenix: I will make you a deal though, Danny… You want me so bad? Well, I tell you what, if you DO get into Money in the Bank, not only will you have your chance to harm me there, but also in a match after Wrestlemania, and you name the time, place, and circumstance.
Danny nods his head in joy as the fans cheer.
Nero Phoenix: …But, there is a catch. If you do NOT win tonight, and don’t get into Money in the Bank, then you aren’t aloud to lay a god damn hand on me now, or ever!
Danny thinks about it for a second as the fans have a mixed reaction. He then suddenly picks up the microphone.
Danny Danger: You’ve got yourself a deal, Nero!
He then drops the microphone back on the ground as Nero smirks and “Bleed American” plays again. He walks backwards, not taking his eyes off of Danny, through the curtain. Danny then picks the microphone back up. He looks straight into the camera, almost a little angry.
Danny Danger: Whoever is gonna be in this damn battle royal, I feel sorry for you, because I just got even MORE motivation to kick everyone’s ass tonight in that fucking ring.
This time, Danny almost slams the microphone down onto the canvas as the fans go insane. He gets up on the turnbuckle that faces the announcer tables and poses for everyone. With all the fans going crazy, no one barely even notices Nero Phoenix who has just ran down until he is in the ring with a steel chair. Danny hears the fans warning him, but when he turns his head, he is smashed six ways from Sunday, so hard he falls to the outside of the ring, landing on the back of his neck, causing a very dangerous-looking bump. The fans boo as “Bleed American” plays once again and a few EMTs come out.
